help! im blinded by the light!
It must have been the smoke or something and then I kept putting my contacts back into my eyes for a week and now I have an eye infection. I guess its really bad because the eye doctor gave me her pager number and said I have to see her like 3 days from today. so I am stuck wearing these new glasses and putting eye drops in my eyes like every hour. I can not go out, I look like a freak. So I am sitting at home. I went to hobby lobby and I bought some beads. I kept myself occupied by beading necklaces. Only I do such things in my family. People here think I am weird and say that I do not belong in the family. I am not upset by that. I've seen more than they which I think is why I am different. But right now I am not seeing a whole lot. Actually this computer screen is starting to annoy me. Flourescent and bright lights are not my friend today. are they ever???



I sat next to this kid that smelled
when I took my midterm exam today...the smell was slowly killing my brain cells, I think that is why I could not think towards the end. It was like my brain cells were screaming for oxygen. It reminds me of that one time that I was put to sleep when I had my teeth pulled. They gave me some laughing gas and I didnt like it, so I started snorting it out instead of breathing it in. What I did not realize was that I was breathing it in after each blow out...and I was gone. I had to do that today, just not breathe in...but I did, you know...you just can not not breathe in.



All this stuff...
why did I decide to take summer classes? Seriously the idea failed the past two summers. I am not in the mood to sit in a class that I do not give two shits about. I need this to graduate. But all I really want to do is something with architecture, or art or even history (architecture or art history that is). you could say they are related to architecture...you could say that. but Im not. and there are other things that are keeping me from concentrating. oh can I scream? like I did in Versailles? like I did in the Swiss Alps? I fear the cops would be called and I would be taken in the Chicago jail. I could then sit in a cell with some thieves and hear their stories...I could say I just let the stress get to me and went crazy...what a story...I think I would be killed for saying that.



OH MY GOD!!
he always says that, its funny too, cuz he has an accent..but hes not saying it to be funny, i dont think. he really think that im stupid...oh how I hate calculus and how he thinks students should not have a life outside of school...but looks like this will be a close one...Im not good with numbers okay...my brain cells have been trained for other things such as drawing and editing lines on autocad, heh yeah. but still I hate math..I do not need calculus im not going to find any derivatives in my designs, the only slopes ill be dealing with are roof pitches and ADA accessible ramps. I just need my degree, I just need to pass and get my degree so i can be an acad monkey for 5 years and then a designer for 15 and then ill be ready to own my own thing...thats the plan, if there was one, more like a dream...and calc, its not in there, there is no room for it. so go away calc, I HATE YOU!!

Fhc